Valentine
by Unknownchocolate
Summary: What happens when someone redistributes all of Sasuke's Valentine's Day gifts? Who did it? What's up with Chi-san being lazy? Will Kura-chan lose her hearing to headphones? Just read it to find out already! XD ChixKura Will contain violence and language
1. One Dead Saint

Alright my dear readers, my penname was formerly K.Gosetsuke. Unfortunately I doubt many of you have read any of my other writing. Though I did have this wonderful idea as a short story. It turns out that this particular short story, decided it didn't want to be so short. Therefore there is an actual plot line! I can't promise that this will be long, or even that good. I honestly never thought that I would see the day when I would write a high school fanfiction. I mean nothing by it, I just prefer reading them to writing them, but I guess there's a first for everything. I hope that you enjoy this, and any creative literary critisicm is greatly appreciated!! .

3 Happy Valentines Day!!! 3

((Be forewarned: Sasuke bashing beholdingness))

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. If I did I would laugh at you all for not knowing the plot line before it's even in print. XD

ChixKura

(This is my own unique way of shortening, and it gives an actual variation on names!! XP)

Also I would like to forewarn you all, that if you do indeed read these author's notes at the top and bottom of every chapter. Later on you may well meet both of my consciences Liarel, and Aurora. They can be odd...let's just eave it at that. I hope you enjoy the story!! -

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One Dead Saint

Showing up once again at the carefully calculated time, she set to work flawlessly, no expression marred her unique features. Finishing up with her designation, she shut the locker with the slightest click of a lock. Strolling down the hallway, hands laying limp in the pocket of her hoodie, she was content to let her bangs vibrate with the volume of her headphones.

A black painted fingernail, adjusted the volume wheel of an mp3 ever so slightly, enabling her to hear the voice of the person who'd fallen in step with her. "Good morning Kura-chan." He said albeit somewhat tiredly, his face only slightly revealing how much sleep he didn't get the night before. "Morbid Morning to you too Chi-san..." was mumbled back as they turned left down another corridor, "So…" he glanced at her offhandedly, "…" was his reply as the song on her mp3 changed. "Is it done?" He ventured cautiously, shoving his hands in his pockets as he ambled down the school halls next to his best friend. "I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about." She replied levelly, though she arched an eyebrow in his general direction at his sigh. "You're sounding like Nara again." He cracked a grin as she shrugged lazily. "It's not my fault that society is so bloody troublesome." He couldn't help but chuckle as he shook his head.

They turned left yet again Kura spacing out with her music, and Chi just lost in his thoughts. They felt the floor shake just slightly and heard the thundering footsteps that pounded the tile floors. Glancing at each other they nodded, and picked up the pace only slightly. They had miscalculated though, as the stampede turned down a corridor up a head, and were suddenly rushing at them both. He froze in his tracks trying not to panic and trying to think of an escape plan as they came even closer to running them over. Suddenly he felt the cool morning air biting at his face as he landed on his feet just barely. He sighed relieved, but alas it was not to be. His savior stumbled clumsily after him and bowled into him just as he gained his balance. After a muffled thud of bodies and concrete, he cracked his eyes open to see who had saved and then collided with him. He cracked a grin at the sight of a sheepishly grinning Kura-chan who had landed sprawled across his lap. They sat there for a moment both assessing any damage done from the short fall, but found only some minimal bruises on her part.

"Well, Sasuke's fan club decided to take the fastest route to their idol." He mumbled as he scooped her into his arms, and standing all in one fluid motion. "Looks like." She grumbled back, he went to arch an eyebrow in at her, but then realized why she was grumbling. He set her on her feet gently, and pretended not to notice anything. She shrugged at his actions, and tilted her head towards the main entrance of the school. He nodded back, and they started walking for the steps both for the second time that morning. They opted not to talk, seeing as they could watch their breath on the air in the early morning chill. Shouldering open the doors, they shoved their hands deeper into their pockets trying to salvage more warmth for their freezing fingers.

Once again the duo walked down the main hall, as they neared the spot where they'd met that morning they both noticed a small crowd standing around. "Gonna check it out?" He asked his companion, and she sighed again but nodded. "Curiosity killed the cat." He stated and couldn't help the amused smirk that streaked across his features, as she glared daggers at him. _If she had cat ears they'd be flat against her head, and her tail would be swishing back and forth angrily, with her claws unsheathed._ He thought smirking even more. "You forgot the other half," she said almost bored throwing him off for a moment. "The other half?" He asked just a bit curiously. _How ironic…_ "And satisfaction brought it back." She finished levelly once again as she turned and they both proceeded to edge forwards into the crowd. They both glanced over the heads of a student at each other and sighed simultaneously. _We should've known…_they thought as they watched a group of fangirls huddled around a locker, and of course in front of that locker stood a boy, Uchiha Sasuke to be exact. Everyone watched as he spun the combo into his lock. The fangirls all held their breath, getting ready to cause temporary deafness upon those within meters, with their 'HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY SASUKE-KUN!!!' Both cringed at the thought of it, but decided to wait anyways.

As he opened the door the never-ending flood of valentines gifts for Sasuke, that was traditional for all of his fangirls…didn't nearly suffocate him this year. In fact not a single thing fell, the fangirls looked ready to burst into tears, but waited as Sasuke turned around with a piece of plain white paper in his hand. It was fairly small, and the fangirls looked at it oddly. "Read it out loud Sasuke-kun." One of the fangirls yelled and was silenced with a glare from those surrounding her. He sighed and ran his hand through his hair, causing all of them girls surrounding to swoon at his collected aloofness, except for Kura-chan of course. Chi-san glanced at her and smirked ever so slightly at the stupid-prick-can't-even-act-I-wish-I-could-slit-his-throat look that she was glaring at Sasuke.

"The homeless appreciate all of the good cheer and gifts that you have so generously bestowed upon them. And I thank you on their behalf for ALL of the things that you donated. Have a nice day. Signed, One Dead Saint." He said, and sighed again as all of the females eyes' glazed over at the sound of his rich voice. _His voice is about as real as Michael Jackson's skin is the color of white out._ She thought laughing inwardly. "One Dead Saint? What? Who's that supposed to be!?" A clueless fangirl shouted. "Valentine's Day is t-the celebration of a Saint that was m-murdered because h-he wouldn't stop marrying y-young couples, after a l-law was made against i-it." Explained Hinata's quiet voice, much to everyone's surprise, but Kura-chan knew better, and wasn't fooled by the stutter. The fangirls looked taken aback at the explanation; they'd had no idea to the history behind the day, only that it was a day that they could shower their idol with even more gifts. Then it dawned on them that everything they'd given to Sasuke had been redistributed to the homeless, before Sasuke even saw any of it. The wail that followed was nearly deafening, Chi-san cursed Kura-chan for having blaring music in her ears leaving her completely unaffected. When it died they panicked and looked at Sasuke who was clearly annoyed, they assumed it was about the missing presents though. "Who is the person responsible for the blasphemous action!?" Cried one of the fangirls, and the others nodded showing their support.

Sasuke's fake collected onyx eyes scanned the crowd until he spotted what he was looking for. "Haruno Sakura, you just don't know when to give up do you?" He said calmly causing the rest of the female population present to glare murder at her, with the exception of Hinata of course. "And why exactly would I do that?" She asked in an extremely bored tone. "Because you want Sasuke-kun all to yourself!" Screeched his fangirls, once again she was spared the pain by her wonderful headphones. "I wouldn't touch the Great Wall of China if he stood on the other end of it." She said blankly, with a shrug earning gasps of disbelief from the crowd of fangirls. Sasuke narrowed his eyes, as Chi-san smirked but it disappeared quickly as Sasuke moved. He stood towering over Kura-chan, smirking evilly at her. "So you say, but I still see you before me now." He taunted moving even closer. "I have no reason to move as it is you that has moved into my way. I have no fear of you Chicken Ass Haired-teme." She state coldly glaring into his eyes superior 'til the end.

"Well we'll just have to change that, won't we?" He muttered so only a few could hear. She arched an eyebrow at him, "If you lay a single finger on me, touch me, or have one of your goons touch me-""You'll what?" He dared her attempting and failing to intimidate her. She didn't even twitch as she watched the tomoe of his Sharingan whirl. Chi-san stepped in then. "Then I'll make you suffer, and I will humiliate you until you want to die." He said coldly slightly surprising Sasuke. "Itachi, what are you doing with this scum?" He asked smirking slightly. Itachi rested his chin on Sakura's head and arched an eyebrow at his little brother. "Changed your mind so quickly, have you?" He asked slightly ruffling her hair with the movement of his chin. "You have a lot of nerv-""Get lost before I begin humiliating you now." Itachi said so aloof that Sakura almost chuckled. "This isn't over yet!" Sasuke hissed before storming away with his fangirls in tow.

Sakura watched him go and shook her head which only made it worse due to Itachi's chin. "Chi-san!" She whined looking up at him. "Yes Sakura-chan?" He asked settling for tucking her head under his chin and wrapping his arms around her. He smirked as he felt her heartbeat quicken. "Itachi-san?" She asked against his collar bone. "Happy Valentine's Day Kura-chan." He whispered softly in his smooth bass, tickling her ear, Sakura spazed scrunching her face up cutely at the intrusion of hot air on her ear. Another smirk graced his features as she looked up at him, studying his face. He dropped his forehead against hers, his bangs falling to block out anything that might distract either of their eyes. "Chi-kun?" She asked quietly, flushed from the blush that stained her cheeks at their proximity. "I'm allowed to be lazy every once in a while." He muttered, even his warm breath smelled wonderful brushing her bangs aside. She smiled at his remark and rolled her eyes. "Come on, or we'll be late for class." Sakura said and somehow extracted herself from his arms and pulling on his wrist gently she got him into the room just as the bell rang. They took their seats in the back, and waited the last half minute for Kakashi to walk through the door listening to Sakura's headphones.

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Alright, I hope that the beginning of this wasn't too shoddy, and that the later chapters will also meet with your approval. I know that there wasn't much ChixKura in this chapter, atleast in the romantic sense, but don't hurry the plotline! It will only make writer's block appear or cause laziness, as we have experienced. Well I hope that you'll atleast read the next chapter to find out who really is One Dead Saint. I mean honestly there's a lot of choices.

Well I guess I should just get it over with...

Please R&R

((For my sanity!!))

Chocolate-san


	2. IchaIcha Paradise

Valentine Ch.2

I know that this chapter is short, but I wrote it during school today, and had the time to type it up. So I would not further my reputation as being a possible neko Nara relative, I decided it might as well go up today. I thank you for reviewing teenagecrisis, I certainly wasn't expecting a response towards it the same day I started it, but it's very much appericiated .

Icha-Icha Paradise

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While it was normal for Kakashi to be late, it was even more normal for at least one of the students to interrogate him on account of his punctuality, or rather lack thereof. His first class, luckily for him, was rather lax and didn't mind much seeing as they could get away with quite a lot in his class, when they weren't being lazy of course. So when he walked through the door he was greeted cordially by some of the students who even paid attention to his entrance. Nodding at them, causing his unruly silver hair to bounce slightly, he walked to his desk and faced the class. "It's Monday." He stated as if it was the meaning of life. The entire class consisted mainly of upper classmen, with a light sprinkling of sophomores. All of them grinned at their teacher, as he pulled his infamous orange book from his pocket and opened it. They were all very much accustomed to his reverent attentions towards those particular books, therefore they ignored him as he propped his feet upon his desk. Soon enough he was sucked into his precious book.

In the back of the room, Sakura was switching songs. Finally deciding on one she grinned at Itachi who was arching an eyebrow at her as the speech played in both of their ears.

_There are no typical murderers,_

_Some plan their crimes meticulously,_

_While others kill on impulse…_

As the speech ended Itachi raised an eyebrow even further. She cracked a smile at his expression, suddenly he found himself staring at a slightly spazing and anime starry-eyed Sakura. A confused looking Itachi glanced around the room but saw nothing, as it dawned on him that the dramatic pig squealing was what had her so excited.

_I like to chew on gum,_

_I like to color paint, _

_I'd like to feel your arm,_

_I like shredded wheat…_

_It's actually not too bad._ He admitted in his thoughts as the song continued. He had to give them credit it was hard to understand what they were even saying with the quality of the squealing. He tilted the mp3 on her desk to look at the screen. He blinked, once, twice, thrice. Sakura grinned at him, "I LOVE this song! It should be the national anthem, ne Chi-kun?" She questioned while gauging his expression. Both Itachi's eyebrows disappeared beneath his bangs, before a short chuckle escaped his lips. Sakura looked bewildered for a moment before grinning again in triumph. Kakashi looked up from his orange haven at Itachi's laughter. "Is everything alright Sakura?" He asked quite curiously. Sakura smiled and nodded. "Yeah, we're fine Kashi-sensei," she said glancing at the recomposed Itachi sitting next to her, fiddling with her mp3, "ne Chi-san?" He gave Kakashi a bored look confirming her words.

Sakura spent the rest of their first class introducing Itachi to the other music written and preformed by the same band. Kakashi didn't stir once from his sanctuary of porn, and everyone was happy on a Monday morning, because they weren't forced to do anything, anything at all. Of course all good things come to an end, and the bell did eventually ring and the students reluctantly filed out of their favorite class, wishing kami on the rest of their teachers and the rest of their sure to be dreadful Monday. As they walked down another corridor towards the second class of their day Itachi looked at Sakura and arched an eyebrow. "Chased Through the Woods by a Rapist?" She grinned up at him nodding profusely. "Yup it's one of the song titles by Waking the Cadaver." She replied cheerily as they made their way towards what was most likely going to be a boring lecture.

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Alright, that's it for now. I apologize for the shortness once again, but I had to do some major cram studying for a forgotten Biology test. I got an 84 - Which is great seeing as I'm not exactly a genius when it comes to chemistry. The other chapters will be longer I promise but I just wanted to get this up here for you. The song is indeed titled _Chased Through The Woods By A Rapist_ by Waking the Cadaver. It is a really good song. If you wish to hear the speech, which is rather short . and hear the wonderful pig squealing, look for it on YouTube. I didn't write the entirety of the lyrics, just the parts I felt necessary for the intended use. Those are the parts that stuck with me while I was writing this, seeing as it was what was playing on my mp3 at the time! XD

Once again:

Thank You For Reading

R&R

Chocolate-san


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